


The monthly recollection of chaos

by lavenderkitten322



Series: The Reconstruction of Uzushiogakure No Sato. [4]
Category: Naruto
Genre: And exasperated at Kisame, And fixing broken parts of the island, For a good reason, Future Fic, Gen, In which i read to many of Blackkat's fics and start envisioning epic bromances, Its mostly sasuke and friends' fault, Mei is angry, Mostly its preventing Kakashi from doing crazy stuff, Obito is Uzukage until Naruto can do it, Rin has an academy of minions, Sorry Not Sorry, Tenzo does damage control, Which is like when hes 20 cause right now he is too busy causing chaos, and has a large movie collection, i accidentally made Orochimaru an alcoholic, i might have a problem, its great fun, not for Obito who's stuck doing the paperwork, or explaining to the council what happened, so like mild spoilers, that he is more than willing to share, that's from different dimensions, the Shinigami listens to music, the answer to the universe is 42, this is like 90 percent crack, zabuza is very proud of his minions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-20
Updated: 2017-11-20
Packaged: 2019-02-04 19:53:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12778299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lavenderkitten322/pseuds/lavenderkitten322
Summary: In which Zabuza, is very proud of his minions (even though he has to share one with Mei and Kisame), Nagato does paperwork, and  Obito complains about some very complain worthy things.





	The monthly recollection of chaos

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly 90% of this is crack. Crack that could happen of course.

“Uggggh!” Groaned Zabuza as he flopped into the nearest chair. 

“Long month?” Nagato said  drily already knowing the answer. He lifted a piece of paperwork from the pile  nearly as tall as himself and started reading it.

“Yes! But not as bad as Obito’s it seems. Dude,” He said turning to gaze at Obito, “you’re staring into your cup of tea as though it has the answer to the universe.”

“The answer is 42. Not that I needed to look into my cup to figure that out.”

“Oh dear what has Kakashi done this time?” Nagato asked. He signed another piece of paperwork.

“It isn’t even Kakashi this time! Tenzo has been doing a great job with restraining Kakashi's chaotic behavior when i cant. And the only thing he asks for are a bunch of branches from different trees! He even fixes up the village after stuff happens!

You know how Lady Tsunade came to visit? Well she saw Rin’s academy of future Medical Nins and was like no way! I can’t have you beating me to my own idea! And now Oto has their own academy! Which is great and all except they have a rivalry that is actually worse than Kakashi’s and Gai’s!”

“How’s Orochimaru taking it?” Zabuza asked  warily . 

“Oh you know with an unholy amount of sake.”

“I wish I could drown in my despair with alcohol; that man is my role model.” 

“Nagato no! Plus, what could you  possibly need to drown in alcohol for?”

“Every single member of the Akatsuki are lunatics! Except for Konan. She is an angel.”

“What happened?” Zabuza said sounding amused.

“ Apparently Deidara has been annoying Hidan so much so that he tried to use him as a sacrifice for a ritual.”

Zabuza started laughing. 

“This isn’t funny you prat! He could have killed him and then I would have to look for another person to replace him! Do you know how much paperwork that would cause?!”

Zabuza laughed harder. 

“How did you stop them?” Obito asked.

“I didn’t. Sasori passed by the make shift ritual room on his way to his workshop and saw what was happening. he put a stop to it by trying to poison Hidan. Hidan took that as an attack on his person and attempted to slice of Sasori’s head.

Kakuzu then appeared yelling at them about the fact that it was expensive to build the hideout. And that breaking one of the rooms would lead to bringing down the amount of money we could sell the property for. It is  supposedly already low as well, Ame isn’t that great of a place to begin with.  Naturally they dragged him into fighting.

Thankfully Konan used those specialized seals that releases sleeping gases, stopped the fight. It was strong enough that it even knocked out Kakuzu.”

By the end of the story Obito was face palming and Zabuza was crying with laughter. 

“Oh God. They are all  really nut cases.” 

“They aren’t as bad as Team Kakashi I assume. Those kids were chaotic as 14 year olds, I doubt they slowed these past two years.”

“No they haven’t. If anything they got worse. Last week Sasuke  litrelly se fire to the rain.”

Zabuza, who was now just quietly giggling (not that he would admit it) went back to full blown laughter. 

“……How?!” Nagato demanded.

“I don’t even know to tell you the truth. All that I do know is he got the idea from listening to the Shinigami’s playlist. A song came on by a woman by the name of Adele who  supposedly set fire to the rain. 

I was very confused as 90% of Shinigami’s playlist is from a dimension in which chakra doesn’t exist.”

Zabuza and Nagato hissed in surprise. 

“Are you telling me a chakra less person welded fire well enough that they set fire to water?!?” Demanded Zabuza. 

“No than God. It was a figure of speech.”

“Are you telling me the brat got jealous of something that didn’t happen?!” Zabuza assumed  delightedly . 

“Yes.”

Silence. Then all three burst out laughing. 

“He of course caused some serious property damage, which we were quick to fix. I would have  temporally benched him except he was already was due to the Sharknado incident.”

“Sharknado?”

“I didn’t tell you both about this?”

“I’m pretty sure I would remember something named like that. Sharknado? What does that even mean?” Zabuza said.

“Shark tornado.”

“…...what?”

“There was sharks falling from the sky.”

“……. How?”

“Suigetsu.”

“Suigetsu? isn't that kid who can turn into a puddle of water right?” Nagato acquired.

“yeah.”

“Kisame mentioned letting him sign the shark contract.” Hummed Zabuza  thoughtfully .

“I don’t understand, how is Sasuke related to this?” Nagato said sounding baffled. 

“Suigetsu and Naruto get along like an already set aflame wooden house and oil.  And of course were Naruto is, Sasuke, Sakura, Karin, Tenten, Sai, and you know were Sai is Shin is sure to follow, Lee, Jugo, and Neji aren’t far behind . Fridays are movie nights. The Shinigami picks a movie from his ever growing collection and puts one on.  The Friday after Suigetsu was  fully integrated into their close knit group, the movie we watched  was called Sharknado . 

In the movie, a city gets hit by a hurricane. It sweeps up thousands of sharks via tornados and dropping said sharks all over the city. Anyway, they wanted to recreate that monstrosity on a much smaller scale. So they went to one of the less significant beaches littered on Uzushio. Using a bunch of water and wind Jutsus and some very happy to help sharks, they managed it.”

“None of the sharks are dead right?” Nagato queried.

“No. Gaara caught them with his sand and deposited them back in the ocean.”

“Gaara?” Questioned Zabuza. 

“He was visiting.”

“And they dragged him and Neji, and Karin into this mess how?”

“Naruto.”

“The kid has some serious charisma.”

“yup. We saw the tornado from the middle of the island and rushed over. They thought it was funny. Which it was, but  really dangerous.”

“So then you benched them from getting any missions and Sasuke set fire to the rain not even a week later?”

“ Basically .”

“Isn’t Sasuke a lightning type?”

“Yes.”

“What an overpowered group of maniacs.”

“Yup. They  are forbidden from using the now S-Ranked Jutsu unless  absolutely necessary. Now that Nagato and I have shared, what’s been happening in Kiri?

“Remember when I told you guys about the time Kisame tried to make tea and  nearly blew up the kitchen? And that he ended up making plasma? Well, three weeks ago he tried to make cookies.”

“NO.” Insert loud weird noises and flaying from Obito and nose pinching from Nagato.

“Yes! The freaking oven exploded and threw itself out the window.”

“Oh God.”

“Mei was furious! Her hair was whipping back and forth in a way I’ve never seen before! She was leaking killing intent; it was terrifying.”

“On a different note, Haku opened up an herbal remedy shop. I’m very proud of him.”

“You’re not upset about it?”

“Nah. The kid always liked flowers and plants. Plus, he still takes mission with me.”

“Who watches the store while you guys are gone?”

“Chōjūrō does. It calming to him. Great potential that one. Mei wants him to be her replacement for Mizukage. In the mean time he’s a part of the seven swordsmen.”

“Good for him!”

**Author's Note:**

> Hopefully i will stop doing one shots and instead get back to the actual story. It seems unlikely though. Oh well. Maybe i should get a beta reader. I'm probably going to end up making a mini series instead centering Orochimaru and a talking squirrel. Anyway, comments and/or Kudos are appreciated!


End file.
